Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Growing Apart...or Growing Up?

I don't know what to do with a relationship that I seem to be outgrowing. A relationship that was with my best friend. And now? we have very little in common. Conversations are short. Because we just don't live in the same world. Our peers are different. Are in a different place in life. We used to do everything together, now we barely see each other. In the beginning we could talk for hours, now neither of us have much to say. We might talk about how our day was, kids, family...? But there's no conversation. We just seem to have outgrown each other. Not for lack of love or trying. But in order to really salvage the relationship, we'd both have to make some major life changes. Changes I'm not willing to make right now. I am in a good place in my life and it obviously centers around my children and career. We just happen to be on different paths...I think we both notice the difference...I'm just the only one willing to admit it. I just don't know how to fix us.

This post actually describes several people in my life right now...and it's probably not you.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

A Very Bad Weekend

I can’t even put into words how bad this weekend was. I could tell you all of the events of the weekend. But it won’t do the weekend justice. It was just bad. It started off ok, I took the afternoon off Friday to get a start on the house since we have a homevisit on Tuesday (today), so I cleaned our bedroom, sorted through winter and summer clothes for the kids, and got us packed up for the weekend.

This is where I’ll stop and tell the POTENTIAL plans for this weekend. We were supposed to meet my cousin in Lexington and hand off the kids to them, they’ll keep the kids for the weekend while we’re in training in Cinci.Then we’d meet back in Lexington and trade back.

That’s not what happened.

We got on the road late, about an hour late. Hit Dayton at 5 on Friday afternoon. Traffic. Hit Cincinnati and more traffic. Sat in a traffic jam for 45 minutes. At 7:45 we passed through Cincinnati (cousins had been in Lexington since 7 at this point). Realized Ryan had broken out in hives, stopped at Kroger to get Benadryl, called the sitter to see if he had gotten into anything that day. He had not.

Finally at 8:30, we traded off children, they headed to the Georgia line and we headed to the Ohio line. Finally got to our room at 11:30…and if we thought that was late….omg. My poor cousin (who should have gotten in at 1:30 finally got in at 6 am due to a traffic jam).

So Sunday at 4 pm, we headed back to Lexington…this time it was our turn to wait. And wait. And wait. There was a huge 6 car pile up, a very bad accident which closed the highway for 6 hours. At 12:30 my cousin and her husband arrived in Lexington. By then we knew it was too late for any of us to get back on the road so Todd rented a hotel room where we all crashed for a few hours. It was a long night. The next morning we all got up and headed home.

Please know I get just how lucky we all were this weekend. An hour or even a half hour difference and my kids could have been IN that accident, instead of in the traffic caused by the accident. I know just how blessed we are!

To add to the chaos, I had a miscarriage this weekend. Not that I wanted to be pregnant. Just a lot of stuff that goes along with that. I had a positive pregnancy test on Friday, and a negative test on Saturday.