Yet Another Seizure.

Friday was a good day, it was pay day (which is always just good) and the boys were behaving, everyone was in a good mood and we were heading to my Mom's for the evening....we were bummed that we weren't going to the lake but it was still good...we had promised the boys a new toy if they could take all the old, broken and unused toys from their toy boxes and throw them away, they did a killer job and have maybe half the toys the originally had so to Wal Mart we went. I had a baby shower gift to buy and they had toys to buy....they each took $15 from their saved up allowance, they went with their Dad to pick their toy, Ethan went with me to pick the shower gift while Lane chose his toy, then Todd brought Lane to me to help with grocery shopping while Ethan chose his toy, it was going well. After getting the last of the groceries Lane and I headed to find Todd and Ethan in the toy department. Ethan finished up quickly and we were ready to go. Walking to the check out, Lane started to swerve as he walked, walking into Todd and into a rack at one point. I held his hand as we walked to the restrooms, I thought about sending him in but then thought better of it and took his hand, we walked together and even then he nearly ran into another customer and the bathroom stall....I knew something was wrong but couldn't put my finger on it at that moment....when he made a mess trying to use the restroom it hit me....he was seizing. I was able to walk him back to the check out where Todd was paying. I took Lane to the van to wait out the seizure and Todd and Ethan followed, his body began to jerk, he couldn't walk, talk or see us. Todd held him, Ethan ate candy and I went back and forth. Ethan was scared, Lane was out of it, Todd and I had so many emotions running thru us that it's hard to say what we were feeling...I was relieved. Don't crucify me for that statement. I was glad to have Todd with me for his second seizure, glad to have it over with and glad to know I could handle this one better than the last. I wasn't scared....I was in shock but mainly I was annoyed that my poor perfect little boy was seizing. Annoyed that he had no control over himself and that my poor sweet Ethan has to be so scared for his brother. After 20 minutes of this, he was able to see us, he cried and wasn't able to speak properly, it came out as gibberish but even that subsided. As soon as he was able to identify his blanket, we let him sleep. He slept from Wal Mart to my Aunt Landa's woods, and when he woke, he remembered nothing, he smiled and for him, life was good. He's been cranky and moody since Friday night, but they say to give him 3 days to reset and become his old self again. I called the neurologist on call that night and he said we can consider this our diagnosis for epilepsy. This makes me sad...Lane will never know life without doctors poking and prodding, he'll never know life without medical intervention and he'll always appear to be perfect. I wouldn't have it any other way...but I would give everything for him to know "normal life"