2011

Goals. Resolutions. Changes. Fresh start. Whatever you want to call it, I'm going to try it.

I want to be more honest this year. I went through some "stuff" last year. #1 reason for not blogging as much. Life wasn't always good. It was dramatic and ugly, but we all survived. So this year I plan to dedicate myself first to God, second to family, and third to my career.

To God: He deserves my time, my energy and devotion. Prayer has recently gone by the way side, I have tried to "solve" "fix" life's problems alone. Turns out I can't do it alone...I don't want to. Worry less, pray more.

To Family: Routine. Healthy meals. Time. My family (the 4 men I am responsible to) they deserve more of my undivided attention. I'll admit that Ryan (a 3rd child) has me overwhelmed. But if I'd slow down and take on one thing at a time we'd be more organized, go to bed earlier and I'd accomplish more and most importantly Prioritize our activities. Use our time together as time together. Pick and choose what we attend...we are too busy.

Career: I work fast, I type fast, I talk fast. It is my biggest flaw. I act without enough thought. I will change that this year. If nothing else changes, this WILL change. NOW. I am making careless mistakes, mistakes that should have never been made. It's slowing me down. I have to re-do some things I've already done, it changes now.

These aren't New Years Resolutions. They are changes I am making in my life. Not just for one year but forever.

Happy 4th Birthday Braden

I have a lot to say. But I could just post last years post because it's still how I feel. I still miss Braden, I still wish he was here. It hasn't even gotten easier. So I'll refrain from a long drawn out pity party post and just say "I love and miss you sweet Braden" Any other day I can rejoice in knowing Braden is dancing whole and healthy with my Savior and Lord in Heaven. But today, just for today, I will sit on the verge of tears at my desk wishing that life was different. Wishing that 4 years ago today we would have held a screaming newborn instead of a lifeless body. We would have planned his future instead of his funeral and we would have laid him in his crib instead of in his grave.

Christmas Play

Is it just me or does Ethan look sickly in this picture!?!

This year we started to do a Christmas play at church but it was WAY over the kids heads...those who put it together didn't consider what the kids were capable of and didn't think before putting kids in parts...and definitely didn't play to their strengths. So it was cancelled. Ethan didn't have any lines and Lane Michael was the ONLY child to memorize his lines. So our pastor stepped in and took a play and made it little kid friendly. He put children in more appropriate roles and made it fail proof. Lane Michael was Joseph and Mallory was Mary (cute), the pastor's wife approached me and asked if I thought Lane Michael could handle it...he is the child who gets up on Sunday mornings in front of the congregation and sings his little heart out, yes, he can do it and would love to! Tyler, Maggie and Grant were shepherds (ignore this...it's more for my own memories), Ethan, Keith and Molly were wisemen...Ethan was the only one to sing We Three Kings and even said Mollies part for her. Kayden and Maddison were inn keepers (they did well), Amelia, Lydia and 2 other girls were the Angels. It was DARLING! I was so impressed! Todd took pics and everyone had a great time! The kids were all on cloud nine! Loved it!

Christmas Traditions

Christmas traditions are really important to Todd and me. We think it's what makes the memories and what keeps them coming home when they're adults...problem is, other people keep messing with my traditions! ;-)

We put up our tree and make cookies and cocoa...usually we do this the Sunday after Thanksgiving, but that weekend is so full of events we were all to exhausted so we did it last weekend (after the Hometown Holiday), the boys decorate the tree while we decorate the house, we make cookies, listen to Christmas carols and just enjoy each other...on a side note, I do not "fix" the tree when my children are done decorating, nor do I allow Lane Michael to follow Ethan around and move all the decorations that are too close to a similar bulb. I love my tree just the way they decorate it!

BFC (Best Friend Cousin) and I kick off the Christmas season with Christmas movies the Saturday after Thanksgiving (this year was a bust - - next year we will do evening movies so that the kids have less energy and actually watch the movies). We eat popcorn and drink hot chocolate, and maybe rearrange the dining room *wink*

We usually do a Christmas trip to Missouri to see Todd's family...this year the host said they didn't have the money or time to host. I really am missing the trip this year. I always have a great time. I heart my sisters in law and brothers in law (most of them).

The Hometown Holiday is always a big hit with our boys...this year Ryan was too sick to get up for the parade...so we waited until a little later and just took him to see Santa (got pictures), went to Casa Chic for an ornament but by that time people were cold, hungry and Ryan was tired. It was a fun morning over all!

The rest of our traditions are more centered around Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. We start by following Santa on the Marine Corps tracking web site as he visits the rest of the world. We eat Christmas Eve dinner by candle light (something special), then we spend the evening baking Christmas goodies, the boys open their Christmas pajamas, get a bath and head to bed. Then Todd and I spend the evening watching Christmas movies and setting Christmas up (wrapping gifts, filling stockings and getting gifts "ready"). We head to bed at about 2 am. Christmas morning we all get up, head down stairs, the boys open their stockings while we put coffee on *grin* and then they're allowed to open their gifts. Although they usually just want to play with the one they open first and stop *giggle* We'll have to be very careful this year what gifts they open first, so they don't get the Nintendo DS first (it'd be all over from there). We then have a big brunch of muffins, rolls, eggs, sausage, bacon, and anything else requested! We spend some time hanging out and then head to my Mom's (we make a quick stop at the cemetery to see my Dad and Braden). We hang with my Mom until we all head to my Grandma Sweet's house and spend the rest of the day.

Some of this varies depending on what my Mom works out with my siblings and their families. Sometimes we get together Christmas Eve and sometimes Christmas evening...they drive me nuts but what can you do *shrugs*

We have other traditions...3 gifts from Santa, and such...we intended for that to be an unspoken tradition but so much of my family goes over board that I sometimes feel the need to defend our lack of gifts under the tree...not that my children have ever minded...

This Christmas is one I'm really looking forward to! Ryan will get the fun and Lane Michael and Ethan will get everything on their list!

Lane Michael from Santa:
Nintendo DS
scooter (Lane Michael can't ride a bike)
BB gun (ugh)
Lane Michael from the 'Rents:
MP3 player stocked with great tunes!

Ethan from Santa:
Nintendo DS
bike
BB gun
Ethan from the 'Rents:
MP3 player stocked with great tunes!

Ryan from Santa:
play house
kitchen
food

Ryan from the 'Rents:
grocery cart

Todd and I aren't exchanging gifts this year in an effort to save up for our pending vaca!

Thanksgiving and Black Friday

Last night Todd turned to me and said "man this is some holiday season. Unforgettable" it's barely started. Ugh. But the get togethers have been so much fun! We started off our holiday weekend Wednesday night, when my sister and her kids and my Mom stopped by for snacks and a fun evening of just being together. We had pizza and pigs in a blanket and played that game where you write a person on a peice of paper and pass it to the person next to you. They can't look and have to hold it to their forehead and guess who it is by asking questions...yah that game. We called it the ICarly game...still not sure why! LOL We laughed until we couldn't and everyone stayed good and late. What started out as a rough night ended up being a great night! Then on Thursday we lazed around, watched movies, I made mashed potatoes and got to Grandma Sweet's in time for dinner at 4:30...Grandma Sweet hosts all. of. our. family. holidays. A few years ago she moved from her much larger homes (finished basement, 2 living rooms and 4 seasons room) to a much smaller home (one living room and dining room and a small bedroom where the kids all try to hang out and catch some privacy). Lots of room for disaster when you're trying to cram 11 women, 6 men, one 13 yo, one 8yo, two 7 yo, one 6 yo, two 5 yo, one 3 yo, two 1 yo and 3 very immature 18 yo. The 3 very immature 18 yo claim the bedroom and we have to constantly drag the little kids out of that room because they're in there saying and doing inappropriate stuff...sitting and laying on/with each other, making vulgar statements and just being teenagers in general. Creepy. But it leaves NO place for the littles to play so we had all 9 kids 8-1 years old in the very small living room playing with toys...Ethan and the 8 year old wandered outside for a little while to play on the porch but other than that it was 4 straight hours and there were NO problems. No yelling, no fighting. nothing! It was incredible! All the stuff that could have gone wrong did not! YEAH!
Todd and Lane Michael left a little earlier than the rest of us, Todd went home to catch a nap before the big night of festive fun...we left the kids with my Mom at about 10 pm, went home to change and feed the dog then we went straight to the w.a.l.m.a.r.t. where we got almost ALL our Christmas shopping done. Completely and totally done for Lane Michael and Ethan! They even got everything on their list...that's not saying much though...they know that Santa only leaves 3 gifts under the tree, one from us and then they get each other a gift. This year Lane Michael asked for an MP3 player, a Nintendo DS, a BB gun and a pillow pet; Ethan asked for an MP3 player, a Nintendo DS, a BB gun and a bike...we couldn't have a bike waiting under the tree next to a pillow pet...but Lane Michael had originally thought about a scooter instead of a pillow pet, so we got him a very cool scooter (poor kid doesn't know how to ride a bike and refuses to learn LOL)...the kids still have to shop for each other, and we still need to do stockings and Ryan still needs food for his kitchen but other than that we're all set...Ryan is getting a play house and kitchen with food and maybe a grocery cart...should be a good year!
Anyway, back to the weekend, Friday was then a lazy day of napping with Ryan, Todd put up his deer stand with his helpers and an evening of sweet wonderful nothing (lol).
Saturday we were up bright and early Todd went hunting and we watched movies with my cousin and her kids for a few hours (we didn't watch any movies but the kids ran like wild people and we rearranged my dining room and looked to see what my hard wood floors look like under the carpet. Beautiful. They left and as soon as they did, the H family showed up to watch the big game (OSU vs Michigan - Go Bucks) we won. Of course! The H family left just in time for Todd to go to work. He got a small side job DJing for a man in Piqua on Thursday nights and as fill in, so he was being trained (phew what a day)
Sunday was church, quickly followed by my Grandma Sweet's birthday party...I went to the party with kids and Todd worked the shop so my Mom could go to the party (my Mom owns a furniture and home decor store here in Wapak - - best shop in Wapak).

I'm SO glad to be back to a routine! We're exhausted...the kids were excited to go back to school after 6 days off but Ryan was not ready...he enjoyed the hustle and bustle of the holidays! He performed for the family like they were his very own captive audience! Hysterical! So funny, they were taping him...he was doing the chicken dance! HAHA Love these boys!

Sigh of Relief

They spent HOURS chasing these stupid ducks that had wandered into the yard from across the field...they imitated them, quacked at them, chased them, loved them, wanted to keep them...I think the poor ducks were happy to go home!

I just love this picture...I'm not even sure what they're doing or what is on the table behind them, I just know I love the picture!

My Mommy and the twins...love.

Lane on a break from his helmet....he got an hour each day....

Oh so little...I love this picture...even if it does show just how young I was when the twins were born...

Happy Halloween! Ethan the clown and Lane Michael a race car driver!

so so sweet...

First Birthday Smash cake...they're so small and so sick!

I love this picture...I sat like this a lot after work...good good times

This is how they slept often...so content to be snuggled up together...

There really is nothing like raising twins. Sweet brothers. Best friends.

Honeymoon at last!

I may have eluded to this in the past...I don't know and don't feel like looking...Todd and I had a bit of a whirlwind romance...we met, got pregnant, got moved, had babies, got married, got separated...of course not emotionally but physically...we married quickly because Todd was going to Iraq and we didn't know when, or for how long. So we never had a honeymoon. I've always considered our trip to Spain to be kind of a honeymoon...it's the only non-working, child-free vacation we've ever had...and last night, we planned our trip to VEGAS!!! We're going in 2 years. I know I know, that's forever away....but we're so excited...and we've waited this long, we can wait just a little while longer! Besides, in the meantime we're taking the kids to Florida for a week...next May...it's strange, we were looking at dates, and I was looking at airline prices, Todd was on the couch, I put in May and was telling him the prices, and he said "check the prices in May" funny, I already had...then when I told my Mom about it, she said "you should go in like May" so it looks like May has it! Woot Woot! The only problem is that I'll turn around and go to Biloxi in June 2011 (very exciting) and the big question is do we take kids or do I go alone? Or do I take a girlfriend? hm....decisions decisions! Now to save enough money for the fun stuff on the trips! YEAH! I think I can do it...a little motivation helps!