Never Expected...

When I think back five years, I remember a lot of the expectations I had...some of which were to have ruggedly handsome, super smart boys...done. Things I knew I would say to them at this age included:
"say your prayers"
"eat your peas"
"tickle-tickle-tickle"

the things I never expected to say (but have) are:
"don't kiss the pizzeria door"
"don't pick your brothers nose"
"get your hand out of that little boys pants"
"don't lick the neighbors car"
"Tyler don't sit on Ethan's head when you're naked"

the questions I didn't expect to answer (but have) are
"how big will this thing get?"
"can I drink from the toilet"
"what's my package for?"

and finally the statements I never expected to hear:
"even if I do cheat EVERYONE wants to play with me"
"sometimes I squeeze my wiener. sometimes I squeeze the dogs wiener. he likes it"

I used to say that we are the best birth control out...if only people knew what they were getting into! LOL! I love it!

disclaimer: I did put an end to squeezing the dogs wiener and anything inappropriate with 'packages'