Friday, June 27, 2008

Treatment options...

Dad saw his doctor yesterday and they said that he's no longer a candidate for surgery because he's too weak. Today we will find out if he's a candidate to continue treatment for the cancers. I knew that he would be taken from cancer but I didn't expect it to be soon. I thought we had two years or more. I don't think we do. I want him to stay as long as he wants to stay but when he is ready, I am ready to let him go. Although I may be too close to know if I will feel that way in a few months. Mom said that things are starting to go down hill fast, so we will go up tonight and spend the evening with them. Todd may take the boys and slip out to see some Panda karate movie that I have no interest in seeing. It will be good times for everyone!

I talked to my brother yesterday. He and I used to be very close and spent all of our time together, but have really grown apart. He is selfish and I say hurtful things when I'm upset or angry which makes it hard for us to like each other. But yesterday something was different. He wasn't selfish. He said that I live 30 minutes away and he lives 12 hours away. I can't escape the stress so if I ever need to talk, I can call him. This is a huge step in the right direction for us. Now if I can stop putting my foot in my mouth, that would help. I told him that if I needed him, I would call.

This weekend should be a great weekend. I have cleared the entire weekend to do a whirl wind cleaning job on my house. I will start the day Saturday with weeding the flower beds. Inside I will rearrange the basement and put up metal shelves in the storage area. Then I will try to get rid of the stuff in the basement living room that we don't use (two old end tables). After that I'll rearrange and see what I can do to make the room flow better. I will clean my laundry rooom from top to bottom. Then I will hit the first floor hard and on Sunday I will hit the up stairs hard. I have a great game plan and hope to get it all done. Wish me luck. At some point in there I would like to go shopping. I need an appropriate dress if I need one, I don't want to have to do it when my mom needs me most. So I will clean and shop and hopefully get it all done this weekend. Phew, I'm off to help my aunt move furniture at her shop here in Wapak...hope I don't get dirty!!