Friday, February 1, 2008

Affording Adoption

I never knew how people afforded adoption and quite frankly I'm still at a in Ohio has it's ups and downs...more ups for us but some downs. One of the many ups is the cost of living. I read about what it costs to live in other areas and what I'm finding is that in any other area at this point we wouldn't be able to purchase our home...we bought our first house, a 5 acre farm, the house was 2850 sq ft and it ran us about $72,500. and this house we're in now is prime location, it has a finished basement, a sun porch, three bedrooms two bath and it's perfect for us, it was $91,500...I don't think there's one other area that we could have bought this gorgeous house for this I understand that in other areas $40,000 wouldn't be a lot for an adoption but that seems like a lot of money...I understand where that money is going, lawyer fees (a lawyer for the birth mother and a seperate lawyer for the adoptive family), counseling for the birthmother, and all medical costs that go into having the baby, not to mention lost wages (maternity leave) and the list goes on...I understand that she's making a huge sacrifice but if we were to go through an agency or a lawyer for our adoption, we too would have time off work. I guess what I'm saying is that to me it seems like adoption is set aside for the wealthy...I have as much to offer a child as any one raising my two biological children, what I'm finding is that money has the least to do with my raising them, I've found that no matter what our annual income is, I'm very much the same Mommy either way. I still want all the same things for my childre (and I don't mean worldly possessions)...So how does the normal American family afford to adopt? Do you save for so long that you're older when you can finally adopt? Do you take out loans so big that you can never again afford the luxeries and if you do get that perfect child you've waited your whole life for, can you never again afford to give that one perfect child a brother or sister...I know that God will provide...he always does...and all of my ranting and raving that I've done here today has nothing to do with our choice in method of adoption...we aren't going through a lawyer or an agency, we're going to adopt a child from foster care...not because of the cost but because we have the opportunity to complete our family. Our biological children have always had some kind of medical issue...pretty much from day one, so medical issues are something we can deal with. Besides, looking at the pictures on the web pages of waiting children breaks my heart...I have fallen deeply for so many and I'm so happy that they have found homes that I can't wait to see my child's face on that page with a heart beside it that indicates that our baby is in it's forever family...that thier last name will be the same as ours and that night when I tuck that beautiful baby into bed I can call her my own, forever and ever. I will raise her with her brothers and her cousins, I will watch her meet milestones and raise her to be the best person she can and to meet her potential, to love people and be expressive. I want all the things for her that I want for my boys...and I haven't met her yet. I can't wait!